Healthy Contraction after Expansion vs. Subtle Self-Sabotage
Can your nervous system digest & celebrate positive change, rather than feel threatened by it?
Hey beloved,
Did you know…
When we’re fetuses growing in utero, we literally develop in a dance-like fashion of expand, contract, expand, contract.
We do this dance at a doable rhythm, and grow bigger and bigger, week-by-week.
The rhythm of expand / contract is our inherent physiological design.
Fast forward to your adult human self.
Your inherent physiological design has not changed.
Your nervous system PREFERS to grow in a rhythmic dance of expansion / contraction.
Which means, if you don’t have a yummy contraction plan in place for your post-expansion moments, your nervous system will likely feel THREATENED by the sense that it’s supposed to only-ever-open-open-open…
And find ways to contract that are more like fear-responses.
Change — even positive change — can feel threatening to nervous systems that are designed to maintain homeostasis and protect against danger.
And threatened nervous systems fawn, fight, flight or freeze.
It’s that simple.
Therefore? One of the most important skills to develop when it comes to sustainable positive change is the capacity to digest it.
Emotionally, physically AND socially.
So that you don’t bounce back into familiar fear physiology to try to protect against the very change you’ve been praying for.
So that your nervous system can attune to a new baseline of safe fulfillment, pleasure and power, as well as find BELONGING as the new you.
Think about it:
If your whole life, you’ve associated radical self expression with your Auntie Beth’s disapproving glare and rumor-starting in the fam, and then you say, publish a memoir…
What do you think will happen next if you don’t tend to your nervous system and cultivate intentional embodied experiences of safety, celebration & digestion?
How about if your whole life you’ve associated having money with being an evil inequitable capitalist asshat…
What do you think will happen when you start making an abundant amount of money? Or are on the brink of doing so?
Unless you cultivate regular rituals for digestion, rest and celebration amidst positive change, your nervous system is 💯 wired to interpret that change as dangerous. It’s sad, but true.
And you will most likely end up self-sabotaging in one way or another:
☀️Fawning away your power
☀️Fighting with the easiest target (often the person you trust the most)
☀️Flighting from the opportunity
☀️Freezing in the face of what you’ve always wanted
ASK ME HOW I KNOW !!! ;)… story coming in the next podcast episode!
So, next time you:
🌟Open to new expansive income streams
🌟Get a new exciting job opportunity
🌟Share your big beautiful medicine in an unfamiliar or exciting way
🌟Feel safer in sex, love, community or attachment than ever before
🌟Step into a more true, powerful facet of your identity
Ask yourself the following questions:
😎How can I intentionally DIGEST what’s happening right now?
😎What needs to be digested so I can rest and integrate the change?
😎What would authentic celebration look like for me right now?
😎Who can see me, celebrate me and honor my growth?
😎How can I invite them into my journey, so that I feel socially safer as I evolve and expand?
This is what my next podcast is going to be all about. I’ll include the simple but profound Digestion Ritual I use over and over again when I’m amidst big changes. And tell you some funny stories of ways I’ve subtly self-sabotaged when I forgot to digest properly. 😬
Trauma-informed expansion… includes contraction. Let’s remember the dance, and grow and thrive together.
Big love,
Rachael
PS – omg, for real… your responses to my first podcast were above and beyond any hopes or expectations I had. I’m super excited that my first episode reached & impacted so many of you. If you sometimes struggle with creative constipation, or simply want a loving kick in the creative arse to get yourself out there imperfectly, tune in right here.
PPS – my intention is to publish my first DANCE TEMPLE this week. It’ll include a pre-dance sermon, and a cosmic playlist in the style of 5 Rhythms. Dance Temples will be free to all for for the first few episodes, then they’ll be made available to paid subscribers only. Who else needs to fucking dance right now???
This email was such an eye-opener! Thank you, Rachael. I cannot wait to listen to the podcast episode. Your writings are always so revealing on a physical and soul level. Thank you❤️